So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
