Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Randomize
