Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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