So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
