Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize