yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
