How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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