Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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