I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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