I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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