You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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