I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
