if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
