Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
