He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
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