week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
