You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize