btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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