my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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