we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
