You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
