stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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