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I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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