hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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