i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
