if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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