I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
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