my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
