if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
My penis needs a shock collar
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
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