Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I'm too high and old for this...
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Randomize
