I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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