WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
