it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
