Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
