how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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