And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize
