That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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