He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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