if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize