did you get engaged???
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
