If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
