My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
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