I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
im holly from the hills drunk
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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