D3 body, D1 cock
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
