I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
