this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Randomize
