I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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