My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Randomize
