We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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