I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
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