Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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