i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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